wake up (let the moon shine)
by falling winter roses
Summary: this pounding fear, it lit me aflame, it made me awake and alive / hate the wolf and you hate yourself / run from reality but you will stop running one day too /\ remus lupin, acceptance, and the wolf inside of him.


**_wake up [let the moon shine]_**

 ** _._**

 ** _remus lupin and the wolf inside_**

 ** _inspired by the song 'come alive' by beth crowley_**

 ** _._**

you are staring at yourself in the mirror

at remus lupin

the boy turned werewolf

you will tell yourself you do not need anyone

what you have is already inside you

.

no one had really ever known the details of how it began

no one had ever asked

they had found you bleeding in the backyard and rushed you off to st. mungo's

and that was the end of it

[so they didn't know]

.

they didn't know how the wolf had truly shown itself to the young wizard

fascinated by the glinting intelligence in the wolf's eyes

it filled you with a kind of pounding fear that seemed to light every part of you aflame

.

everything after that was a blur

you didn't really know what had happened.

/\

those nights you came alive with a sense of fear and adventure and most strangely…

you felt love.

…

for the wolf inside of you

you should hate it for transforming you into this…

 _creature._

but you don't.

.

you never do.

.

why?

.

you push it away

you try to hate the monster inside of you

but all you end up doing is hating yourself

[well, maybe that is what you deserve

 _freak. monster. worthless. creature.]_

.

the flame inside of you is growing

it wants to be seen by your ever-averted eyes

soon you will finally see it and it will blind you with its roaring light

/\

you are growing more attuned to the wolf's feelings with every day that passes by

it matters no more if it is full moon or not

you are hearing the wolf speak in your mind

its soothing voices awakes some primal rage inside of you

.

you roam free that night

you are letting go to the wolf on those moonlit days

you are coming alive

.

 _wakeupwakeupwakeup_

a million billion trillion different voices

hissing snaking roaring mewing barking speaking

in your mind

the wolf is speaking to you

the wolves are howling at the moon

.

you fall in love with the wolf

and you fall in love with yourself

you cannot hate yourself anymore

it is not what you deserve

you can understand that it was never your fault now

.

you run free that night

you don't care anymore

you don't care about hating about thinking about staying

you are running and it feels so

 _free_

you are free

and that is the best part of it all

.

for one night you leave behind your daily fears

you forget the past and throw away your future

you embrace the

 _right now_

you are screaming and howling and you love the feeling

you are not holding back anymore

.

you embrace the inside of your heart

the snarling terror

the primal rage

but the unspoken love

the barking laughter of young pups

it overtakes the faults of the whole

.

embrace yourself

stop running in circles

chasing your own tail

you are yourself and no one will change that

you are your evils and your goods

you are the wolf

but you are also the human

each has its evils

and each has its beauties

.

embrace the wolf

embrace yourself

feel the fur upon you

and you fall apart inside as you accept who you are

but you crumble and then you rise inside

you are resurrecting into yourself again

.

the darkness of your so called disease runs in your very veins

it runs deeply in your soul

and it is not wrong that you would never change that

that will never be wrong

.

you are waking into a new you

you are waking into a future into which maybe you won't be so hated anymore

maybe you won't be so despised

.

 _if you want to change the world, you have to start by changing yourself._

.

you are changing but yet you are still the same

you are still

 _you_

.

 **the moon is shining tonight.**

 **you are waking up.**

 **.**

 **a/n: this was written quite randomly on the plane while extremely COLD and DRY and UNCOMFORTABLE and very, very, _very_ tired.**

 **i was listening to the song and thinking about harry potter when this idea came to mind. hope you guys liked it, i suppose. please excuse any errors i made.**


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